What is self-care anyway?

“How we spend our days is, of course, how we spend our lives”
― Annie Dillard

It struck me that this frequently tossed around phrase could be misunderstood especially when for some it conjures up decadent images of bubble baths, candles and expensive chocolate and for others it may mean to deliberately say, no but thanks anyway. Recently, I asked a good friend for coffee and her answer was “I’d love to, but instead I need to recharge my batteries and rest”.

Self-care takes both discipline and awareness. It’s true in times there may be little we have control over; however, in those instances we can choose, what will we do with these moments? Discipline may be your routine for the day which includes balancing many items such as how to fit in priorities and structuring time thoughtfully when your schedule is wide open. Discipline sounds strict but if it benefits one’s connection to themselves might it be positive? Take for example, what we should do vs. what will be healthiest for our souls? 
 
Could we not continue to expand our thoughts around self-care to include a greater awareness of self and how we tend to regulate our emotions which affect our actions?  Becoming aware of our actions is an eye-opening experience.  Maybe self-care is pausing before saying yes to that invitation or the reverse in saying no to that drink of alcohol even though everyone else may be having one? 
 
Maybe the most important aspect of self-care is not about self at all but instead how caring for ourselves affects those around us we love the most. Let’s spread self-care to ourselves and others today.